Anger is Good
Parents get angry, but anger isn’t always bad. In fact,
parents often get angry with children because they’re doing something
wrong. It’s best to view anger as a flag, created by God, that says,
“Something is wrong here.” The something may be an unrealistic
expectation on the parent’s part, but it’s often a problem in
the child that needs attention. Disobedience, selfishness, arguing, and
bickering are just a few of the things that make parents angry. Anger can
be a tool to point out problems in life.
The danger comes when parents use anger to solve problems.
That’s when people get hurt, relationships become strained, and
distance is the inevitable result. It’s one thing to see those muddy
shoes on the floor. It’s yet another thing to start yelling at your
son.
We say that anger is good for identifying problems but not good
for solving them. That’s the conclusion we’ve come to after looking
at several Bible passages related to anger. James 1:19-20 and Ephesians
4:26-31, for example, show two sides of anger. On the one hand they warn
strongly against it, but on the other hand, anger isn’t prohibited
but is limited.
So the next time you feel angry, stop for a moment, thank the Lord
for revealing a problem, try to figure out what it is, and then go back
into the situation with a constructive plan for solving it. This will take
practice but children provide many opportunities to develop more Godly
patterns in anger management.
This tip was taken from the book, "Good and
Angry, Exchanging Frustration for Character in You and Your Kids,”
by Dr Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller.
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